I was recently asked to write my biography. It was interesting to work on it and recall the most impactful moments of my life, the moments that formed me into who I am today. I felt some shame and doubts as I was writing. Shame about the mistakes I had made that caused major life disruptions and course changes, and doubt about whether my life’s accomplishments were “important enough” to share with others. Yes, I’ve accomplished some big things in life, but, like most people, I’ve also made some big mistakes. All of my choices -good and bad- have shaped me into the woman I am today. The thing is, we all have a story that will end up being written in a bio or a eulogy about us one day. If you had to rely on someone else to write your story, what are the aspects of your life that you’d like them to share?
If you were asked to write your biography today, which life
events have made the most impact on you? Which relationships matter most to
you? Are you happy with where your story currently stands? Where do you hope it will end, and what will
it take for you to try to create the life you want? Of course, many things in life that
dramatically impact us are out of our control, like an unfaithful spouse, the
death of a child, or a serious health condition. But the beautiful, wonderful thing about life
is that some things are within our control- such as how we respond to our life
circumstances. We can make new choices
each day to create positive outcomes. If
you do not like where your life has taken you so far, what choices can you make
today that could positively impact your life? For example, even though I became pregnant as
a young, broke, college student, and subsequently became a single parent, I
knew that if I finished my degree, I would be able to build a more financially
secure life for my daughter and myself.
Would that mean that everything would be perfect and did that guarantee
a financially secure life? Of course not, but it was a step in the right direction. The little steps we take in life that lead us
toward the right direction truly make all the difference. Maybe it’s finally ending the toxic long-term
relationship you’re in. Maybe it’s
forgiving an abusive relative (but that doesn’t mean you have to include them
in your life!).
There’s a story in the Bible, in John, chapter 4, about a
woman who had an interaction that dramatically impacted her and changed the
course of her life. We do not know her
name, but we know that she was a Samaritan, which was an ethnic group with
which Jewish people did not associate.
She came up to draw water from a well where Jesus, a Jewish man, was
resting and asked for a drink. I imagine the shocked look on her face when,
as scripture notes, she questioned why he would be asking her for a drink. At one point in their conversation, Jesus
tells her to go and get her husband. She then tells him that she does not have
one. Of course, he already knew this,
and he tells her so. He knows that she
has had five husbands and the man she is living with isn’t even her husband. Jesus
would ultimately tell her the good news- that he was the Messiah. He told her
that it didn’t matter where you come from, but as long as you worship God in
spirit and in truth, you will have eternal life with him. The point of this story is to show that it
doesn’t matter where you come from, or the choices you have made- good or bad- and
it doesn’t matter where you choose to worship God, so long as you worship him
with your whole being (this is a whole topic for a later post!).
We do not know what became of her after that. What we do know is that she made a great
impact on the world by making the choice to believe Jesus and to share his good
news with others afterward. It was a
simple choice that made a dramatic impact.
We don’t hear about her again in scripture, but we know that moment had
a highly positive impact on her. Maybe if
she had written her biography, she would have written that she had a tough life
of simply trying to survive each day. She
then met Jesus, who offered unconditional love and forgiveness, and her life
was never the same. Her conversation
with Jesus changed the trajectory of her life.
I would love to know what happened in her life after that, but I’m sure,
though imperfect, it had improved.
My life has been full of ups and downs. I’ve made bad
choices, and others have made choices that have negatively impacted my life. I
have gone through childhood abuse and have been in other abusive relationships.
Those were choices others made, which I will have to live with and work through
the rest of my life. All of these
choices have led me in various directions, and have been difficult to deal
with, but each time that I’ve decided to take a positive step/make a positive
choice after a bad one (made by myself or others), my life has ultimately
improved. Of course, I can’t say that
every positive choice we make will ensure an easy life. That is not what I’m saying at all. My life certainly has not been easy. However, like the woman at the well, I have
met Jesus. He’s told me about myself and told me that he still loves me and has
a great purpose for my life.
I challenge you today to write out your life story. Write
down the most impactful events and relationships, and where they have taken you
so far. Now, write down what you want to do next. What are your goals? How
would you like your story to end up? We
know that we cannot control what happens in our lives, but we can control our
actions and how we respond to events and to others. What actions will you take next to help you
get where you want to be?
While we know that positive choices do not guarantee an easy
life, if you stay focused on God and on loving others as you love yourself, no
matter what happens, your personal story will end well. You will have lived a life to be proud
of. God will be with you every step of
the way- regardless -if you make good or bad choices. The woman at the well represents all of us. We all have a past- but, more importantly, we
have a future. Whatever your situation
is, you can make choices each day that will help give you the personal
biography that you’d be proud to share.
